|Sometimes it all gets to be a bit....much.
The facebooking, the tweeting, the trying to get a blog post up every. single. day., the finding something witty to say, and don't forget to add in a picture for that extra personal touch and the Instagram factor. Because ya gotta BE the brand, baby. Beeeeee it. Which, y'know, means I will have actually had to shower that day. And have changed out of something other than my usual uniform of my six year old yoga pants...the ones that have that hole in a very unfortunate location.
I swear to you, sometimes I look at other people and I think they must be some sort of breed of super human from a planet far, far away. Just give them a cape and a red pair of tights already. And a vaguely familiar metropolis to watch over. Because, game over. They win. Somehow, they just seem to be able to do it all with time to spare. All without batting an eye or a hair out of place.
And...it exhausts me.
I beat myself up over it.
And way too many times, I've let it ruin a perfectly good day.
Justin & I sat together the other day in Nantucket over a plate of hummus and these cheese stuffed sweet pepper things that I swear were gilded straight from heaven.....and, I melted down. I confessed to him every perceived failure, every missed opportunity, and vowed right then & there to just give up forever. (In case you haven't noticed, I tend to get a little dramatic when hummus is involved.) He listened quietly as he does, and added two more olives to his plate. Then he chewed thoughtfully and said, "Maybe it's not easy for them at all-maybe you're just seeing the finished parts. And for all you know, people might be thinking it comes just as easy for you."
People of the Internet, just in case there is any confusion at all, let me go ahead and tell you:
* I spent three hours this morning writing this blog post, most of which was spent rhythmically banging my head on my desk just willing the words to come.
* Sometimes I have to tag out of social media completely, because the flurry of noise of what other people are doing and who is getting to do what and with whom, and who is flying off to where gives me heart palpitations and a pit in the bottom of my stomach. And let's just be real, makes me, yes, maybe just a teensy weensy wee bit jealous.
* Going along with that, I sometimes (completely irrationally) get all angsty that we weren't part of a lunch or dinner that I see on social media....the one that, y'know, took place THREE THOUSAND MILES away. Seriously, what is wrong with me??
* Sometimes I just stare at my Twitter app. Hoping that it will write something witty for me. It never does.
* When we were in Nantucket working, I got up three and a half hours early before we had to go shoot to write that Pancake Session with the couples graph. But when only a few people responded, I spent the rest of the day feeling like maybe it just didn't count.
* In real life, I look put together about 10% percent of the time....that just happens to be the same 10% that I normally show you. The rest of the time, it's straight buns and yoga pants for real.
* I have made my husband mad at me trying to get a self-portrait of the two of us for Instagram.
* I save my good outfits for days when I know there will be pictures taken.
* Contrary to what Instagram might tell you, we don't actually eat only really, really pretty food all of the time. :)
* I feel like I need a PhD in Zuckernomics just to keep up with the facebook changes every day. Can't they just leave it alone already?
* I spent another fifteen minutes staring at my cursor trying to figure out how to end this list.
** And speaking of getting showered & out of the yoga pants, here are some scenes from our time in Nantucket. But just so we're keeping it all honest, five minutes later... my hair went back in a bun.